Falling Off the Wagon

So was I the only one who tanked after Christmas on their diet that was going extremely well?

I didn't make New Year's resolutions this year, besides getting healthier and being happier. However, between the stresses of January and February; weather, traveling, work, and other things I kind of lost myself. 

I fell off the wagon.

I'm committed to going back to the gym. I'm committed to my smoothies, and a hardcore diet for the next few weeks because I would love to feel like a goddess on my birthday which is just a few weeks away. I'm not expecting monumental changes, but I just want to feel better. Thankfully I still have time, and more time afterward to get ready for Summer.

One of the reasons I think I stopped was the overwhelming feeling I get when I go to the gym and I literally feel like I'm the only fat girl there. (Yes, I see you lady judging me on the elliptical.) Gyms aren't just for skinny people though, and sure, I see a big girl once in awhile but it's rare so I started panicking in the car one day and I haven't been back since.

The sheltered life has kicked me in the face, yet again. I don't want to be like this in this body forever though. It's overwhelming shopping for clothes, and all my other friends can wear whatever they want and I have to wear a potato sack. So I'm working backwards and starting over.

Here are my new goals:

1) I refuse to wear dumpy gym clothes. I work in retail right now and I can afford nicer, newer things because I deserve them. Working out doesn't have to feel dumpy.

2) I need new gym shoes. Something that can handle Zumba and like light running. I know nothing about shoes. I bought my last pair on clearance at Walmart, but they're horrible for Zumba.

3) I need to not judge myself. I need to love the part of myself that likes going to the gym.

4) I need to cut down on the classes. Healthy competition is good, but panic attacks are not! I usually start panicking before the classes, and then I only get through half because I mess up a step. I hate messing up, I took serious dance classes as a kid so I can't deal with failure.

5) I need to learn to fail. I need to have good days and bad days at the gym!

Did you ever fall off the wagon? How did you get back up? Leave me a comment, or suggestion and I'll write a post compiling them together in the next week. I'd love to hear from you.

xo,

C

Health: Addicted.

(Image from tumblr)

I can't be the only girl on the planet whose done a late night Taco Bell run, but we're not always honest about is the following morning, the next day when you wake up feeling absolutely horrendous! Split minute decision turns into weekly trips to the drive-thru, and then the weekend, well ... then you've got the Reader's Digest version of,  what I did in my early 20s. A very close family member to me has been really making an effort to change it up, and she's gotten super healthy and she's really started motivating me without even saying anything. (This is why she's one of my favorites!)

So ... what are we going to do? Eat as clean as possible, at home, for ONE month.

Is there a possibility that I could fail? Of course! I'm really going to try and keep those feelings at bay though with exercise, and a good attitude. I really just want to do this up right though and see if I can make this a committed, personal lifestyle change. Hunter and I ran the Color Run this past May and I loved every single second of it. It was so empowering, but I also loved how I felt that whole day afterward when I realized that I had completed almost 3.5 miles in one go. This October I'm committed to another run, (although I'm not sure if Hunter will attend this time even though he was a trooper in the May race), but I am super excited!  What I would like to change is my goals for the race, and that is decreasing my first run time of 1 hour 10 minutes to around 45 minutes. I know I can accomplish this but my training has to start now.

Currently I've been experimenting with a lot of home workouts in addition to taking early morning walks with our puppy Finn. I get a lot of them from The Lean Machines, (they have a whole playlist worth of 10 minutes workouts here but also check out their youtube as well), and I love yoga so I've tried out PsycheTruth where they have a whole beginners series of 20 minute yoga workouts. Yoga does work, but you need a good teacher if you're just starting out so you do the moves correctly and you'll notice the significance as to how you feel later. As always, since the pavement is the cheapest gym I try to do runs when it's not too hot but lately since we've been hitting 100 degrees or higher here I've been indoors.

If you need cooking ideas, there's so many great books. I love the Eat This, Not That series because I think once you get to the maintainence level of fitness, they can help you make better lifestyle choices when it comes to meals. Just remember if you're just starting out,  or for those people like me, who are maybe restarting again for what feels like the 1,000th time you don't have to be perfect all the time to be healthy. If you feel it, you are, and if you truly feel it then let that keep you going! I have a long way to go, but as we all know it's about the journey not the destination. We need to be happy along the way, because once we reach our final goal if we aren't inwardly happy with ourselves then we've already failed. In the mean time, cooking at home it one of the easiest decisions you'll ever make for your health. I'm obsessed with Jamie Oliver, his cooking is so good and he has a whole youtube channel dedicated to easy things you can make at home! No DVR required. I also like healthy southern comfort foods from The Deen Brothers, and if you follow me on Pinterest I have a whole board dedicated to good eats. Please check that out if you're ever in need of inspiration.

I think that's it for now, but be sure to look out for future posts about my progress.

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